SOS!! Calling all Vampire Hunters!!! Urgent!!!!

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I am collecting a multitude of V. Slayers.

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To eradicate the outbreak of Vamps in France.

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There has been an unusual amount of Gypsies “disappearing” from the Provence region in the South of France.

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In the city of Cassis, it has been especially severe. After the city’s yearly festival honoring the patron Saint of the Gypsies (Saint Sarah) there has been an extra-ordinary amount of vampire activity. So many homes abandoned or vacant. No one seems to care because they are Gypsies. That’s not right, we need to help out people in need.

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I can’t do this alone, I need your help. I am trying to amass at least 100 V. Slayers by the end of the month.

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Your humble servant,

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Sven the VS

p.s. Not really your servant, I will be in charge.

Sven, 

Happy to see your e mail. I loved the south of France!! Gypsies of course don’t own homes – otherwise we’d call them “Romanians” – but regardless, if the vacancy is what you say it is in Cassis, I bet the price of real estate is rock bottom. I was in Marseille a few years ago and prices are outrageous there. I would love to own a bit of real estate on the Mediterranean. Thanks for the tip. Please don’t tell too many people about this. Is this some pyramid scheme? If so, that is fine I am already a diamond member of Amway & I have the Pink Escalade from Mary Kay. All I ask is that I am up the pyramid as much as possible. I will be in Eastern Europe for some Slaying training by this weekend & will need some down time (offing French vamps definitely qualifies, the trick is killing them before they surrender). I can be in Cassis by mid-week.

Eugene V.S.

p.s. Don’t ask me to STOP, that’s weird.